DW Fic: Something like Quantum
Apr. 28th, 2006 09:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
owlSomething like Quantum
Rose and the Doctor discuss the events in Tooth and Claw. U-rated.
"I can't believe it," the Doctor complained. "Talk about gratitude!"
"I bet it was what you said about poor Sir Robert being happy 'cause his wife was away. I thought the Victorians weren't supposed to know about that sort of thing." She shoved him in the ribs.
"I'm not taking any more bets from you! I think it was all that 'not amused' stuff that got her so...not amused." He shoved back, rather harder. "Well, that makes the rest of the Victorian age a no-go area."
"1901," Rose said at random. She was still aware of the feeling like a bruise, like when she'd been in P4 and realised that Carly Randall didn't like her at all.
"That'd be about right, yeah. They usually forget about me in a couple of decades."
"Usually?" Rose gave him a suspicious glance. "This happen to you often, then?"
"Well," he said, slightly sheepishly, "winding up the current ruler's never a good idea. I've been banished from the Cetagandan Empire, the Empire of the Two Suns, and now the British Empire."
"But I am British," Rose said. "Got my passport an' all."
"Your passport," said the Doctor, in the scornful tones of one who owned a TARDIS. "Oh, can we stop off in Cardiff for my passport, I'd really like to see Mickey too. Might as well be the driver of the London-Cardiff bus."
"Do you think it'll still be there when we get back?" Rose said, suddenly panicked. It was as though she'd opened the TARDIS door to find it an empty box, or gone home to find Jackie gone without trace and a stranger there instead.
"In my experience, all important documents vanish when you start looking for them. 'S...quantum. Something like quantum, anyway."
Rose groaned; 'quantum' had been the word of the week ever since they'd been to see some bloke with a name like Heisenberger or something. She hadn't understood a single word, nor any of the squiggles that he and the Doctor had been so interested in.
"Nah, don't worry about it, we didn't change any history this time. Your life still happens the way it did. Will happen, I mean. Will have happened. English isn't really a good language for talking about time travel, all those stacks of auxiliary verbs."
"Hey," said Rose, the question occurring to her for the first time, "are you speaking English, or has the TARDIS been translating for me all this time?"
"I'm speaking English. Practically native, me."
"So, anyway...you don't reckon Queen Victoria passed a law banning Rose Tyler from Britain, do you?"
"Have you any idea how hard it would be to get rid of all the Rose Tylers in the twentieth century? There's dozens of them. Hundreds."
"And all this time I thought I was unique," Rose said. "Where's this lift you were promising earlier?"
"Entirely, completely, uniquely unique." He put his hand between her shoulder blades. "See that cart over there?"
"Bit of a come-down from the TARDIS, innit?"
He grinned. "Hey, we have a horse. That's a major advantage around here."
"Oh, and you owe me a tenner."
"Yeah, right. Get a knighthood, ten quid. Cheaper than our competitor, Tony Blair. Banishment thrown in for free, this week only."
His rueful tone was at such odds with the words that Rose couldn't help giggling. "You sound like an advert for a bargain basement."
He brightened up. "Aw, I love bargain basements!"
"I should've guessed. I remember, the very first time we had chips, and you you made me paid because you said all the Earth money you had was only good for the thirty-fourth century—"
"—this really smart circuit worked into them," the Doctor was saying enthusiastically, "that made anyone who bought one really, really happy. So half the city was sitting around as high as kites, in no state to notice that the government had been taken over by aliens."
Rose laughed. "Okay, all right, that's a sale with a difference. So...when we get back, where'll we go next?"
Rose and the Doctor discuss the events in Tooth and Claw. U-rated.
"I can't believe it," the Doctor complained. "Talk about gratitude!"
"I bet it was what you said about poor Sir Robert being happy 'cause his wife was away. I thought the Victorians weren't supposed to know about that sort of thing." She shoved him in the ribs.
"I'm not taking any more bets from you! I think it was all that 'not amused' stuff that got her so...not amused." He shoved back, rather harder. "Well, that makes the rest of the Victorian age a no-go area."
"1901," Rose said at random. She was still aware of the feeling like a bruise, like when she'd been in P4 and realised that Carly Randall didn't like her at all.
"That'd be about right, yeah. They usually forget about me in a couple of decades."
"Usually?" Rose gave him a suspicious glance. "This happen to you often, then?"
"Well," he said, slightly sheepishly, "winding up the current ruler's never a good idea. I've been banished from the Cetagandan Empire, the Empire of the Two Suns, and now the British Empire."
"But I am British," Rose said. "Got my passport an' all."
"Your passport," said the Doctor, in the scornful tones of one who owned a TARDIS. "Oh, can we stop off in Cardiff for my passport, I'd really like to see Mickey too. Might as well be the driver of the London-Cardiff bus."
"Do you think it'll still be there when we get back?" Rose said, suddenly panicked. It was as though she'd opened the TARDIS door to find it an empty box, or gone home to find Jackie gone without trace and a stranger there instead.
"In my experience, all important documents vanish when you start looking for them. 'S...quantum. Something like quantum, anyway."
Rose groaned; 'quantum' had been the word of the week ever since they'd been to see some bloke with a name like Heisenberger or something. She hadn't understood a single word, nor any of the squiggles that he and the Doctor had been so interested in.
"Nah, don't worry about it, we didn't change any history this time. Your life still happens the way it did. Will happen, I mean. Will have happened. English isn't really a good language for talking about time travel, all those stacks of auxiliary verbs."
"Hey," said Rose, the question occurring to her for the first time, "are you speaking English, or has the TARDIS been translating for me all this time?"
"I'm speaking English. Practically native, me."
"So, anyway...you don't reckon Queen Victoria passed a law banning Rose Tyler from Britain, do you?"
"Have you any idea how hard it would be to get rid of all the Rose Tylers in the twentieth century? There's dozens of them. Hundreds."
"And all this time I thought I was unique," Rose said. "Where's this lift you were promising earlier?"
"Entirely, completely, uniquely unique." He put his hand between her shoulder blades. "See that cart over there?"
"Bit of a come-down from the TARDIS, innit?"
He grinned. "Hey, we have a horse. That's a major advantage around here."
"Oh, and you owe me a tenner."
"Yeah, right. Get a knighthood, ten quid. Cheaper than our competitor, Tony Blair. Banishment thrown in for free, this week only."
His rueful tone was at such odds with the words that Rose couldn't help giggling. "You sound like an advert for a bargain basement."
He brightened up. "Aw, I love bargain basements!"
"I should've guessed. I remember, the very first time we had chips, and you you made me paid because you said all the Earth money you had was only good for the thirty-fourth century—"
"—this really smart circuit worked into them," the Doctor was saying enthusiastically, "that made anyone who bought one really, really happy. So half the city was sitting around as high as kites, in no state to notice that the government had been taken over by aliens."
Rose laughed. "Okay, all right, that's a sale with a difference. So...when we get back, where'll we go next?"
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no subject
Date: 2006-04-28 09:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 01:30 pm (UTC)Ii was a sort of free association on 'Empire', and I can't see Gregor doing the banishment thing. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-04-28 11:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 01:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 12:21 pm (UTC)I love social commentaries in fics. hehe.
no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 01:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 02:23 pm (UTC)I can see and hear DT say this—expression and inflection just popped into my head as soon as I read it =) Also like the idea of the doctor on Cetaganda...wonder if he ever saw a haut-lady? ;)
no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 05:24 pm (UTC)